Thursday, July 17, 2008

Curves Can Drive a Woman Mad

Here is one of my schematic designs. who wants to walk on one of my funky see through ramps I'm proposing? I don't usually use curves when I design (too hard to build a model with my remedial tools) but for some reason I decided to incorporate all kinds of curvy shit in this design. Should be interesting though...

Studio Shmoodio

This is me at my studio not wanting to work on my schematic design. It's summer. I should be on a beach on the North Shore of Oahu right now. Not stuck at school working on my final.

By the way... I really don't smile like that when I'm confused over schematics.

I'm liking this mobile blogging thing!

Mobile Blog #1

I'm trying out this mobile blogger thing. So this post is really just a test. But I wanted to show you guys a label from a very disgusting tasting bottle of "alcohol". The name of the product is the only good thing about it.

I Used to be a Bad Ass...

... but I don't think I am now and I don't know how that happened. There used to be a time when I would strut, literally STRUT, around and I knew that my shit did not stink (figuratively speaking, of course). I could do no wrong. I wanted something (a job, a project, a boy, a friend, etc.), I would get it by any and all means necessary to attain whatever it was I desired. I had friends who would tell me that I didn't even need to try or work hard to get what I wanted. It would just come to me.

I was desired. I was sought after. I was wanted.

I was a Bad Ass.

But now, as I get older, I realize that things are a little harder to come by. I don't make friends as easily. I don't know if men even look at me (of course, I do have a boyfriend so that would be a moot point, really), I don't have steady work, and all ideas or inspiration I desire to come never really comes. I struggle harder than I used to and it's becoming quite perplexing.

I no longer live the charmed life I used to lead.

But do I really want that charmed life? Even when I was a Bad Ass there were times when I would question myself and think, "These things come too easily." Then I would become complacent. And then I would get bored. I'm no so easily bored and I definitely am no longer complacent. In fact, I think I have discovered a whole new realm of restlessness I never knew could exist inside of me.

I want to do everything. I want to design, I want to write, I STILL want to direct the few scripts I've written, I want to finish my book, I want to get married, I want to have children, I want, I want, I want...

All this wanting makes me so agitated sometimes that I think I'm going to explode out of my skin. But then I think to myself, "If I do get all these things, what happens once I get them?"

I don't know.

I'm just saying...

I used to be a Bad Ass.

Sunday, July 13, 2008

It's been a while...

I know.

But new stuff to come soon.

In the meantime, you can reread this blog to your heart's content, check out my other past blogs that I've linked to as well as my myspace blog (which has more recent postings).

I promise. More to come soon.

~ The Flipness